Good Characters, Inc. (oh, the irony) has launched a new application for Apple iPhones called "Chinese Alphabet".


http://goodcharacters.com/blog/blog.php?id=110

The application uses a set of random Chinese characters to correspond with 26 letters in English alphabet. The company claims this will "add mystery to your writing".

At least they are smart enough to put up this disclaimer at bottom of the page:

"The translation provided by Chinese Alphabet is intended for personal use and entertainment only. Not recommended for tattoo artists to use this to tattoo their clients, iPhone app developers to localize Chinese apps, CIA agents to communicate national secrets, or security professionals to encrypt passwords."

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MERRY JESUS-BIRTHDAY! to all of you, my patient fellow Sundergirdians*, or, as a soul might say in the Half-Continent, "Hale Thisgivingday!"

Time is inexorably moving on and not too soon we will be in the actual year of Book 3's publication (if not the month yet).

I want to thank you all for a year of great (though, I confess slow) blogging, of the ever excellent exchange between us. My hope is to regain some much needed energy over this festive (festy?) break to stride off in the new year with slightly more constant bloggingness (+ thoughts on a whole new story to embark, Lord willing). As always, we shall see.

May this be an excellent time for you all,

D.M.Cornish

*a citizen of the Half-Continent.

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http://www.bme.com/tattoo/A91210/high/jyc7-tribals-natural.jpg

At firs, it looks like pure gibberish - mixed Japanese and Chinese characters:

厉 カ ネ 羊

But looking more carefully, perhaps the idiot started with these characters:

励祥

But then he decided to switch from horizontal to vertical writing, and then split up the characters at the wrong places, making two characters into four.

Hopeless!

By the way, what does 励祥 mean anyway?

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from: Herouth M.
to: tiangotlost@gmail.com
date: Mon, Nov 30, 2009 at 1:43 AM
subject: [Fwd: Emailing: P1230294.JPG]

Hi. I'm from Israel. Love your blog.

The story goes like this: I study Japanese for several years now, and I can read about 1400 kanji more or less. One day, my co-worker approaches me with his cellphone. "Can you tell me what this says?" he asks me, showing me a photo of a piece of fabric carrying the kanji 私変態. I take a look, and reply "It's not grammatical, but it basically says "I'm a pervert".

"What?!"

"'I'm a pervert'. The first character means 'I', the other two mean 'pervert'", where did you get that from, anyway?

"It's on my 1.5 years old daughter's shirt!"

After LOLing for about 15 minutes straight, I kind of demanded that he get me a photo of the complete shirt so I can send it to Hanzi Smatter. And here is the shirt, complete with the cute, luckless 1.5 years old "hentai" herself.

I mean, yes, I have seen intentionally-made "hentai" shirts around the web (and on Hanzi Smatter). Adults buy them and wear them for the laughs. But who in his right mind would put this on a toddler's shirt, and sell it in a children's clothing store rather than a joke shop? I can't imagine.

Yes, I suppose it *could* mean "metamorphosis", but really, outside scientific contexts, it's almost always means "pervert". Or am I wrong?

Cheers,
Herouth



Cute kid, though. The "bunny" or whatever kind of cute animal that is also on the shirt is a nice touch. We have obviously uncovered a diabolical plot to "pervert" innocent youth with inappropriate hanzi!

By the way, the T-shirt would be cuter and better if it was grammatically correct, like:

私、変態なんです。[I ... am a pervert.]

私、変態かも…[I might be a pervert...]

As it is, it sounds more like Tarzan-speak: "me - pervert." You kind of expect "you - Jane" next.

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Remember Kinoki, the detox footpad, turned out to be a ripoff?

Alan and I present you, Osuke nutritional supplement:



For those who are interested, the product's laughable claims are detailed at its website.

However, we would like to point the readers to the five characters below OSUKE:

行迎友先天

The phrase has virtually no meaning in either Chinese or Japanese. But, using our handy-dandy Decoder Card for Gibberish English-Chinese Tattoo font, guess what 行迎友先天 corresponds?

OSUKE

After reading the product's name is complete gibberish, would anyone pay US$37.95 for a bottle of this supplement?

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Another set of Gibberish English-Chinese Font

Alan and I have discovered another set of gibberish English-Chinese font that many people are getting tattooed with. We have compiled this handy-dandy decoder card for those who want to be entertained deciphering gibberish tattoos:


DecoderCard.pdf

Using decoder card, this tattoo below is "SABINA", in gibberish of course:


http://www.bme.com/tattoo/A91117/high/jph9-untitled-image.jpg


Update: Nov. 22, 2009 - Alan has created an updated version of Decoder Card:


DecoderCard_v2.pdf

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Good News & Bad News

Well, in the midst of completing the 3rd draft, I shall, with great trepidation, start with the bad - as is customary. There is no way to say it but straight: the release of Monster-Blood Tattoo Book 3 will be delayed until September of next year (2010).

*wince*

Sorry, sorry, sorry. The fault is mine for the time I have taken to write it. Apologies to everyone for causing any consternation at such a revelation. A silver lining to such a cloud is that it gives it all time to be just that bit better (the flip side of this being, it better be pretty darn good now then, huh?); also it will give you more time, Ms Ventress, to get a Sebastipole costume ready *hopeful face*.

Okey dokey, on to the better stuff...

June next year (2010) is when my very first short story - The Corsers' Hinge (see your nearest explicarium for what a 'corser' is) - will be released here in Oz as part of an anthology called,

Australia's Legends of Fantasy

It will be published by Harper Collins, Australia. For you folks in other lands, I shall let you know closer to the date how you might (if you wish it) get your own far-away hands on a copy.

I am very chuffed to be included as a "legend" (who would not!) and some of the other genuine legends involved will be Sean Williams*, Kim Wilkins*, Garth Nix, Trudi Canavan, Ian Irvine*, John Birmingham, Cecelia Dart-Thornton, Juliet Mariller, Jennifer Fallon, and on and on... Quite a list, huh? When a cover image becomes available I shall post it so you know what to look out for.

*I have illustrated one or more of their texts.

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